January
3: Eve: "I lost the 'Ms. Garden
of Eden' contest when they found I'd posed clothed for PLAYBOY.
January 8: "These Japanese dogs
are great!"
January 11: News Report: "Cuddles, the Fabric Softener Bear,
went berserk today..." (Last used 7-8-95)
January 21: RipVan Winkle's slumber party.
(Last used 7-13-95) |
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February 5:
Sports for Masochists: "Hey, why are the cleats on the inside?"
February 10: Francine knew Bob's face with the back of her hand.
February 14: "I call Pete my Dream
Man, because I'm hoping he'll disappear when I wake up." (Last
used 10-22-97)
February 19: "Awright, maggots,
pay attention to Mr. Whiskers here..."
February 26: "Bob tries the taditional, love-snaring neck bloat
of the common toad."
February 29: Free Association, Inc. |
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March 10: Private School
Bully.
March 11: Snow White and the Seven Politically
Correct Dwarfs.
March 22: One teee to anothe r- "It's a great policy, Stan. I
get $5,000 if I lose a limb."
March 23: Bob's band sounded better in the shower. (Last used 7-4-95)
March 28: Mrs. God: "Sure, He's
master of time and space, but just TRY to get him to pick up his clothes."
March 29: World Heavyweight Food Fight! (last used 12-14-96)
March 31: "I hate to see you suffer, Maynard..." |
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April 6: Phil has his
'game face' on.
April 10: "We're not important enough
to have a poster child. We have an index card child."
April 12: "Shhh! Quiet ladies. We've spotted the blue-blodded,
gold-carded, Rolex-wristed, mansion monkey." (used again 11-9-06)
April 20: "The Rolling Stones 2026 World Tour" (Used again
9-7-05) |
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April 1: "Marcie,
get that dog off the table! He's using the wrong fork!" (Next
used 8-24-05)
April 4: "We're going to automate at the office, Bob. So we're
replacing you with this paperweight."
April 6: "Bozo!! - The fragrance that makes people...LAUGH!!"
April 9: "You have a compound, compound,
compound, compound, fracture, fracture, fracture, fracture."
(Later re-used 12-30-06)
April 10: "I love you from your sloping, suborbital-ridge forehead
to your hairy, prehensile toes."
April 12: The first and last stunt by
Emil Kneival, Amish Daredevil. (Later re-used 12-8-06)
April 20: Mr. Spock: The Retirement Years.
April 22: "Jowles body was a temple, but his mouth was an atheist."
April 27:(Bumper sticker on Bob) "My other boyfriend is Mel Gibson." |
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June 12: "I like
what you've done with your hair." (Used again 8-23-05)
June 17: The Attack of the Real Estate
Developers From Space. (Also used 6-6-95, 8-9-07)
June 26: "Bob, you're infected with
tiny planes...and you're a carrier." (Later re-used 11-22-06)
June 27: "Have you tried a moisturizer?" |
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July 6:
Moses the Barber: "Wait'll you see how I part hair."
July 19: "Check out the see-through
blouse." (last used 6-21-95)
July 20: "Captain, I'm in trouble on Hill 47! I need reinforcement!"
(Previously re-used 6/14/97. Later used 2-17-05 and 1-17-06)
July 21: The Amway Pit Viper. (Last used
6-21-97)
July 28: "Thank you, members of the Academy." |
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August 2: Chicken:
"Does the fact we're called BROILERS alarm you at all?"
(Used again 12-27-05)
August 4: "All those in disagreement with me say 'So long gainful
employment'." (Used again 7-26-07)
August 10: The Magic Finger Bed. (Used again on 8-3-2005)
August 19: Cowboy Bob's crippling arthritis of the armpits got him
in a lot of trouble. |
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September
7: "The company has decided to automate, Quigman. We're installing
a Mac processor in your skull".
September 12: "All I want is a nice midlife crisis!"
September 18: "With all my problems
now, how will I know when my mid-life crisis gets here?"
September 19: "That sidewalk vendor sold you a fake Roledex."
September 20: "In a previous existence
Marlene was a Cossack while Marty was a hassock."
September 21: "He certainly takes after his father, doesn't he?"
September 22: "Oh my! The Buffalo Gal has come out tonight."
September 28: "You might say old Bob is just a drifter."
September 29: "Congratulations! You may already be a loser!"
(Last used 2-22-96) |
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October 10: A high-strung
gme of emotional poker.
October 18: Tragically, Bob had set his Thigh Master on reverse.
October 19: Environmental archiologists
October 21: "Are you people ready for 'Cringe Rock'"? (Later
re-used 11-28-06)
October 24: "I live in a very fashionable neighborhood."
October 25: (eye & hand) "Yes
folks! Now we find which is quicker." |
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November
4: Bob finally began scraping the "Don't laugh, it's paid for"
bumper stickers off everything he owned.
November 17: Super-Intendant! (used once
again 1-4-2007)
November 20: "Parents are probation officers with food."
November 21: "What do I do with
this pluggie-innie-dealy?"
November 23: "Here's my proposal, General Barksider. Will you
marry me?"
November 28: Mister Rogers, All-Star wrestler.
November 29: Declaration of Codependency
|
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December
2: The drivers license of Dorian Gray (Last used 3-6-96)
December 4: My dinner with Lassie. (re-used again 6-9-05)
December 14: "Substitutions? I want him!"
December 16: Home boy, l'homme boy. homogenized boy, om boy.
December 19: Ivy League Frat Games.
December 26: Bob embarks on a guilt trip
December 27: Comic Relief Pitcher
December 28: Francine's moisturizer worked too well
December 29: My biological clock has a snooze bar |
